I’m sorry Bob, but this is not working out the way I had hoped it would. I need you to start packing.

Bob you are not the one for me

I know, Bob. I made a lavish promise that I hoped our love affair would last. But let’s face it–for such a new model, you cannot hold a candle to Rando with a vacuum even when he has done it no more than twice in 39 years. I mean first, you ran out of juice after only a couple of wobbly passes, even though you said you had a full charge. Then for no apparent reason, you just stop charging yourself with only half a charge. That is like magical thinking, Bob, and normally we outgrow that by age 7 or 8.

My tech geek called for support, and they suggested you might have a faulty charger OR a faulty battery, so they shipped both replacements. Now while you were able to sit still long enough for a decent charge, after roaming in a couple of circles like playing hide-and-seek in a blindfold, you still just shut yourself off and went home and refused to charge again. Tech geek said in his educated opinion you had a faulty capacitor and could not carry the load, thus, when you got hot, you shut yourself down. (And when it comes to computers, robots, and other highly complex electric circuitry, he is always right, which is a good thing even if sometimes slightly annoying to be reminded of it).

I will give you credit Bob, and I thank you for choosing that option rather than setting yourself on fire. But please understand where I am coming from here when I say this relationship is not working out. We did our due diligence homework before picking you, and based on consumer reports, you would best meet our needs…which might have been true if you had not had faulty something-or-others.

We have had two Dysons. The the last time, we went with a Shark, because frankly, while I also “think things should just work properly”, Dyson was getting a little uppity with the price tag while the second model was no where close to the quality of the first and did not last near as long nor clean near as well. We opted for the Shark, and believe me, while normally I do not cavort with a shark, this Shark is top notch in my opinion and very cavortable. Tech geek discovered Shark also has a robot vacuum and it will empty himself into his own little trash bin!

So, Bob, you get to go wherever it is that bad Bobs have to go. In all due respect, I will indeed wipe the doggie hair off and send you back with a shine, just to show there are no hard feelings.

To anyone who might be thinking of buying a robot vacuum, I recommend you wait for the Shark review first. As you know, sometimes, things just are not as they have been made out to be. For now, Bob gets a one-way ticket, and Sharkbot gets a home visit.

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11 Responses to I’m sorry Bob, but this is not working out the way I had hoped it would. I need you to start packing.

  1. I’m envious. I would love to have a Shark that is convortable! Maybe I do. I’m not on a first name basis with my vacuum, but it does the job when I push it around. Mine was never meant to go out on its own. Good luck with the new robot!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. peggyjoan42 says:

    I must admit you kept your sense of humor when you gave Bob the boot. Enjoyed all your puns. Guess this is called false advertising – Bob was just not up to par.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Betty says:

    Sorry to hear Bob did not live up to all your expectations – liking working! Years ago, I bought a refurbished Dyson ball vacuum (which I read about on Clark’s Deals), and that is still working great. I also bought a Dyson stick vacuum from Costco. Love it! I thought about a robo vac, but our home isn’t too big, we have a cat, and the Dysons continue to impress. I am interested in the Shark review though. I enjoyed this lighthearted post. Good luck!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Suzassippi says:

      Our first Dyson was awesome–which we got because of the pet hair function and not wanting to deal with bags anymore. Glad you still have a ‘working relationship’ with yours. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. janebye says:

    That Bob reminds me of another Bob who did things that didn’t really work out for us…you know who I mean. LOL Thankfully I am a procrastinator and did not run right out and buy me a Bob. Sorry he was a disappointment but sounds like he needed to go!

    Liked by 1 person

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